I suck at blogging.
By now, most of you are aware of this fact. I try. I swear I do. But my biggest obstacle is trying to find a topic that I don’t think will bore you to tears. I actually just wrote an entire page, reread it, and deleted it because it was yawn-inducing.
So, as I sit here in my office, looking out the window at the crisp, sunny fall day, I decide maybe the smartest thing to do is to blog about what’s currently on my mind. Okay, then. It’s fitness. Fitness is on my mind. Why? Because I happened by the mirror while unclothed this morning and was horrified by the…roundness that has come with being in my forties. It’s all in my hips and belly. I told Bonnie I want to cover all the mirrors because I have become too round to lay eyes upon.
Her response: “I love you, Round Georgie.” (Because she knows I’m ridiculous.)
Fitness is something that hooks me in spurts. I have had three separate gym memberships, none of which I used to its full potential (the last one, I visited exactly four times, even though I paid for an entire year’s membership). I know this is because I would rather exercise alone than have strangers who are more beautiful and skinnier than I am watch me grunt and sweat and make me feel self-conscious. Therefore, I have everything I need right here at home: a ton of free weights (well…not literally a ton…), a good recumbant bike, a punching bag, a couple Jillian Michaels DVDs, and two dogs that love to take walks (and a neighborhood that’s very conducive to walking). The only excuse I have is my own laziness, and that is something I’m trying to combat. It’s often a losing battle. Do any of you suffer from this issue? You know you should get up and do something, but you’re too tired/lazy/whiny to get off your duff?
I began on Sunday. Again. I am aware that it’s ridiculous (not to mention utterly futile) to bitch and complain about something (my bod) if I’m not willing to make a change. So, I’m trying. Again. My goal is to do something–anything–that can be considered some form of exercise every day. Whether it’s walking the dogs (we have a 2 mile route we try to do every day), doing a 20-minute session with Jillian, riding the bike for half an hour, or picturing somebody’s face on the punching bag, I MUST DO AT LEAST ONE THING EVERY DAY. That’s my goal. I’ve gotten through five days, which isn’t really a lot, but I’m happy about it. Let’s see if I can keep going, especially with the holidays looming.
I read a few fitness articles here and there, and I have my favorites. I try to pay attention to what I eat because I know that food also contributes to my shape. As do the beginnings of menopause, which I know I can do very little about, but still makes me want to scream, “This is so unfair!” Maybe it’s because I’ve always been in decent shape without a whole lot of effort. I’ve never been a small girl, but I’ve always been athletic and busy. Now, age, hormones, a bad back, and life in general has kept me from being as athletic, and the calories I do eat hang around longer instead of burning off. I can’t fight some of those things; I get that. And I do know that fitness is just as much about health as it is about appearance, and I’m trying to remember that. I want to keep my heart healthy so I can stick around for a while and annoy Bonnie.
The biggest thing, the most important thing, I think, is perspective. Sometimes, we lose it and it takes something eye-opening to help us gain it again. I may not be thrilled with the shape my body has taken over the past year or two, but let’s be honest. I’m fairly fit. I’m healthy. I’m alive. Those three facts alone give me permission to roll my eyes at myself, shut the hell up, and be thankful.
Tell me your stories. How did those of you who’ve gotten through the dreaded menopause years combat the changes in your body? How did those of you who went from unfit to fit do it? I will read all guidance and advice voraciously! Just help me get through this before I drive my wife insane!
I’m going to go ride the bike now…